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Objective and positive.
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There is always something magical about conversations that last through the night, even more so when it's with the people who are special.
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'Years' is a pretty cool song. I love it very much. 'Sea Creatures' & 'Youthful Hearts' too.
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I first came to know about this singer when I was heavily using SoundCloud for a time (mostly because the company I work at had their network upgraded at the time and somehow, Spotify would not work after that) and it was here that I came across Axel Flóvent's song 'Youthful Hearts' which became an instant favourite, and from there, I followed the artist on social media, and after that, the rest was history.
A double feature today. Here is the first:
I suck at managing my energy in conversations. I can generally manage a one-to-one conversation just fine, because I can align fully immerse and align myself with the one other person I am talking to. Another individual would still be quite manageable, but from there on out, it will be a gamble; and the odds are hardly ever in my favour. My attention gets stretched pretty thinly and I will get overwhelmed, and soon I will have lost the plot of the conversation and tuned out completely.
While I am aware that it is probably not anything new at this point, I realised that drawing during these conversations helps. I have been doing it for sometime now, but have yet to say anything about it because I needed to do enough of it first before I could be sure. It doesn't necessarily refocus all of my attention to the conversation -- I'd most likely still lose parts of the plot if it is a topic which I am not normally engaged in -- but I don't get easily tuned out. I would still be able to pay attention to the vibe of the conversation and keep to the pace, listening in for cues, in case I would be summoned for an opinion or response.
Just a little something I would like to note -- a little something to explain the double feature today. *wink wink*
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I am still clearly not over the film yet. I guess I'll just let this energy ride till it fades away. I don't feel all that sad anymore, but the heaviness left behind by the film still lingers.
The figures were especially hard to paint and I realised I still lacked practice on human figures, especially when it came to painting. Something to consider in the future.
But regardless I thought it was overall still alright. Then I was about to stop here but then I noticed that the main figure herself, isn't really standing out, so I redid her a little bit, with a bit more white on her shirt -- and this is where I must remind myself to purchase more whites because I am running out already.
So after 6 hours working on this piece, here is 'Back to Sankt Radegund', inspired/motivated by my still ongoing recovery from Terrence Malick's 'A Hidden Life'.
A room
"Save us the trouble!" they cry.
His wife.
What have I done?
And that is all he needs.
I have just come from watching Terrence Malick’s ‘A Hidden Life’, and let me just say, this film ripped me to complete shreds and the scene above was what destroyed me in the end.
Iban Longhouse Interior
Acrylic on brown paper, 20cm x 14cm
2021
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Today is Gawai here in Sarawak. For those who are new or unfamiliar with this holiday, it is the harvest festival of the Dayaks (local indigenous people of Borneo Island), and it is celebrated every year on 1st June. This is normally the time when our Dayak brothers and sisters would take a trip back to their respective villages to be with their families and ngabang, as they laugh and cheer over a bountiful feast and a sea of tuak (local rice wine). This year, things had to be a bit different, given the current state of the pandemic here in Sarawak.
But regardless, the Gawai spirit lives on as friends and colleagues take to social media and other online means like ZOOM calls to reconnect. I like to think of it as virtual ngabang.
And in keeping with that spirit, I thought I’d do a painting to celebrate together, albeit in a small way.
I have planned this since yesterday, though I wasn’t sure what I was going to draw. All I knew was that I had this urge to draw something for the occasion. I initially thought of doing something similar to the ‘Stavkirke’ painting, where I would have the Iban longhouse shrouded in mist and our little character as a silhouette in the foreground looking up at it. I thought it was okay, so I went over to Google to look for reference photos, but couldn’t find anything that ‘spoke’ to me.
And then I found this:
I thought it was quite an interesting photograph to study (especially in terms of lighting and shadows) so I decided, instead of that landscape picture I had in mind, I’d make a painting of this instead.
So I began with a simple sketch. I then added a figure in the center to populate it, because I just love adding little subjects to paintings.

Then, I transferred this over to a bigger sketchbook with brown paper in it.

I can't exactly say what my reason for using brown paper is, except that I felt like I should. Then I started marking in the shadows and lights.

Once I have the general shadows and lights laid out, I started to add in the details. The following pictures will show the process.
I ended up using mostly phthalo blue, burnt sienna, yellow ochre and white for the painting, with a little bit of brilliant red in places. I avoided using blacks mostly because I wanted to try playing around warm and cool tones to depict light and dark in the picture.
And it turned out better than I thought. For much of I focused mostly on what were illuminated by the light and did not fixate so much on what lingered in the shadows; those received maybe a few random strokes at best.
Overall, I am quite happy to have work on this painting. I have learnt quite a fair few things, especially when it came to disregarding things hidden in shadows, focusing instead of shaping what the light touches.
Selamat Ari Gawai. Gaya Guru Gerai Nyamai.